A God-Awful Small Affair

We're coming up on the eight year anniversary of thee mighty LJ, and I am celebrating it by mass-protecting the vast majority of the entries on here. Why? Because that was then, and this is now. Oh, and neither you nor I need to hear about what my day was like on, say, September 2, 2002. I'll give you a hint, though: I was 20 years old, and I am pretty sure I was having my usual daily panic attack about boys or how my life sucks or something combining the two. Like I said, you don't want to know.

Then, we used things like "AOL Instant Messenger" and "dialup" and "animated GIFs" to illustrate our journal entries. We had "Geocities" pages and painstakingly typed out the artist and title of every single CD we owned, formatted it in HTML and gave it a fetching neon green on black layout, a la "The Matrix." Or perhaps that was just me. But I digress.

Now we Twitter and Facebook and Last.fm and we text message constantly, and we use blogspot instead of, for example, the increasingly obsolete site you're currently looking at. And we certainly don't have daily panic attacks, especially since we're with the Best Boyfriend Ever (TM). Now, we just get pissed off if we have to wait for our espresso, or if all the stair steppers are full at the gym. Being a grownup is pretty awesome.

Don't worry, though. I'm still a fiend for rock n' roll, I still write like it's my job (because it is), I'm still a raging leftist feminist, and I still muse insignificant for your momentary pleasure. Some things will never change. I promise.

1. What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
Ran three miles without stopping. Got my own health insurance. Wore a cute bathing suit without too much self-consciousness.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I did! And I'll always make more.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
No one close, but several friends did.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No one close.

5. What countries did you visit?
Canada.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
Money.

7. What date from 2006 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
So many.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting a full time career important big girl job. Learning how to be active and losing a shit ton of weight. Falling in love/meeting my best friend.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Spending money poorly. Messing around with dudes that weren't worth my time.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Strep throat and a concussion.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Plane tickets, sexy dresses and a shit ton of records.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent, bills, coffee, booze, clothes.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Work, traveling, friends, Zach.

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
New albums from NIN, Nick Cave and Amanda Palmer; the Zombies, Tom Waits, Jarvis Cocker.

Compared to this time last year, are you:

17. Thinner or fatter?
Much thinner.

18. Richer or poorer?
Slightly richer.

19. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Traveling.

20. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Spending money in a dumb way.

21. How did you spend Christmas?
With Zach and his family, friends, and my own family. Best Christmas as an adult.

22. Did you fall in love in 2008?
Yes, yes, oh yes.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Adult Swim, Daily Show, Colbert, Cash Cab!

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I strongly dislike a few.

26. What was the best book you read?
I read so many good books! I don't know!

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
More metal. 16 Horsepower. Gillian Welch.

28. What did you want and get?
Love. Reasonably sexy body. Job. All kinds of wonderful things.

29. What did you want and not get?
Nothing I can think of. I just have to perfect the things that I did get.

30. What was your favorite film of this year? Either "I'm Not There" or "The Dark Knight."

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 26, and I slept late, had lunch with Summer and Andy, cleaned the apartment, went running, bought a pretty dress, went to bars with my wonderful friends, went to a party with a bunch of random people and hooked up with an oddly intriguing army guy. I win.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
More money to go on more cool trips. More good writing.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
I'M A SIZE 8 WHAT DO I DO I KNOW I'M GOING TO BUY SO MANY CLOTHES I HAVE TO THROW SOME OF THEM OUT BECAUSE I HAVE TOO MANY AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

34. What kept you sane?
Music.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Barack Obama.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Barack Obama; gay rights.

37. Who did you miss?
Bernie, Mary, Anna, Bonzey, Bridget, all my dead homies.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
I met him before, but I think I met him officially this year: Zach. Duh.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008:
If you want something bad enough, you better go out and get it. Beauty truly is only skin deep. Patience is a virtue; so is hard work.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
This will be our year / took a long time to come.

I am not even going to attempt to catch up on two months worth of posts from you guys.

I work about 80%of the time. The rest of my time is spent running, being rock n' roll and hanging out with my awesome boyfriend. My new apartment is totally baller, and I got a raise two weeks ago. Last week, I took a ferry ride to an island, met Malcolm Gladwell, and bought a hot red strapless dress at Goodwill for seven bucks. Tomorrow is Halloween!

Hey! A black democrat is going to be President! Holy fucking shit!

How are you?

I was accepted into this

I'm going to have to buy an evening gown. Better make a trip to Mardens!

Did you know
that it becomes much harder to type,
play guitar,
text message,
turn pages in a book
and take your contacts out
when, at 1 a.m.,
after a couple of whiskeys,
you've burned the fucking shit out of your fingers
on the white-hot filling of a s'mores flavored pop tart
that's spent a minute too long in the toaster?

You do now.

Just so you know, I still read my friends list almost every day. I just seem to not care about posting much anymore. When the spirit hits me I'll write a poem type thing or post some music or a recipe or whatever. But I pretty much use Facebook exclusively nowadays. Or MySpace, if I'm feeling trashy.

That said: in order to keep my longtime LJ friends abreast of my well being, I'll say that I'm still living in Bangor (obviously), I'm still making a living as a writer (how the hell did I work that one out?), and I still go running almost every day. And I still totally heart David Bowie (#db 4evor). I am currently reading "The Omnivore's Dilemma" by Michael Pollan and "White Noise" by Don DeLillo. I am currently listening to Boris' "Pink" on repeat until my ears bleed, followed by Nina Nastasia, Portishead, Led Zeppelin and Jay Reatard. I kind of still love Barack Obama. I'm basically crazy busy every day, and when I can take a day off to do nothing but lay around and fuck off, I'm totally doing it. I'm breakin' hearts, I'm breakin' glasses, and I turned 26 last Saturday. On a scale of one to ten, I'm gonna go with a 7 or an 8. I think a 10 would involve all the aforementioned things, plus, like, an unlimited credit card that I don't actually have to pay for, a Sephora and a Nordstrom and a Garment District next door to my house, and a hot dude picking me up after work on his motorcycle and cooking me some amazing dinner and then, uh, y'know. World peace or whatever.

In three hours I'll have been awake for 24 straight hours. Awesome. Time for Emily to sleep. Add me on Facebook, why don't you? I will share lots of retarded YouTube videos with you, and entertain you with witty status updates. LJ is so 2002.

This may seem rather shallow and insufferably indie rock of me, but the fact that I saw a guy wearing a Replacements "Sorry Ma Forgot To Take Out the Trash" t-shirt, and then had a long, delightful chat with a guy wearing an Electrelane t-shirt, all while drinking whiskey at open mic night at Paddy Murphy's in Bangor, Maine, makes me very, very happy. Now, to be fair, there were some dudes covering Dave Matthews Band on stage at the time, but nevertheless! Progress!

The woman at the bar wore a big silver necklace,
rings on eight out of ten fingers,
and smoked her cigarettes from a holder called a Medico.
She told me that water seeks its own level.
I told her I found that to be very true.
The universe is a game of billiards.
That's not the first time I've been told that I have an old soul.
Turquoise is soft,
and amber can be green,
and gold is too showy, but we like it anyway.
She sang along to Ziggy Stardust,
and then she told me exactly what I needed to hear.
She gave me her cigarette holder,
because I used a fake one in a play in tenth grade,
and because I should have it.
Liz, I hope I see you again.
Have a safe drive back to Millinocket.
Beware of Greek sailors.
I am happy to have met you.

Chaplin Park.
Grass is greener at 5 p.m. than it was at 10 a.m.
60 degrees, breezy.
There are petroglyphs on the sidewalk:
Cam, Tate, David and Claire were here,
followed by strange symbols;
a half moon and a circle, a smiling face,
a double cross and a cube.
A pack of boys, bicycled,
patrol past me, silent,
jeans and sweatshirts,
messy hair, no homework.
I am part of a long chain of events,
from mammoths to Monday afternoons,
crocuses struggling up from the cold soil, again,
shaking the dust from the long blanket of winter.
Walk the dog, plant the corn, procreate,
put a flag on your front porch to signify the season change.
I don't want to think about the future,
just the past, and how it clings to the present,
tugging on its shirt tails,
heavy and insurmountable.

"Some people never have anything except ideas. Go do it." - The fortune cookie I opened on Easter Sunday at my Grandparents' house.

Lucky numbers: 3, 11, 21, 31, 41, 43

George Carlin - Angels
The Gun Club - Brother and Sister
The Rolling Stones - Play With Fire
The Raveonettes - Aly, Walk With Me
The Shirelles - Will You Love Me Tomorrow?
Cat Power - Metal Heart (2008)
Nine Inch Nails - 9 Ghosts
Boredoms - Super Are You
Yeasayer - Wait For the Summer
Venetian Snares - Hajnal
Sir Edward Elgar - Introduction and Allegro, Op. 47
Arthur Russell - Our Last Night Together